& may the fourth be with you

It’s a pun. Get it? It’s a Star Wars thing. See, they got this thing called “the force,” and—ah, nevermind. You know what’s going on.

This last week was finals week where I work. That means two things:

  1. Tons of grading
  2. Full-time Stay-at-Home duty starts NOW.

Over the last week or so, I also got a couple packages in the mail from Hasbro. I’m on the mailing list of the PR company that does their “action brands” now. Mostly just to make you jealous. I’ll talk about the second package later, but today it’s all about the first package I got from them. Because it had this in it:

2013-05-04 14.51.53-2

What better time to talk about it than a national Star Wars holiday, right? I mean, we got the day off from work and everything!

So, just in case you can’t tell, those are toys based on the Angry Birds Star Wars app. Which, if you ask me (although nobody did), seems a little backwards, non?

On my iPhone, I have a whole bunch of electronic versions of games that I grew up playing in their original cardboard-and-plastic iterations—checkers, Battleship, Parcheesi, Monopoly, and so on. That seems pretty normal, so that I might be able to play against someone if I’m by myself. It also does all the setup for me so I don’t need to go find the box, get in an argument about who lost the damn top hat, sort out all the remaining pieces, read the rules, get in an argument about the rules, pilfer pieces from other games and the junk drawer just to be able to play the game, get in an argument about the rules again, flip over the board, then storm out of the room. Saves me all that work.

This goes the opposite way—it takes a wildly popular computer game and puts it in the real world so that you now have to go through all those extra steps to play. In the spirit of this idea, I considered writing this blog post out by hand and mailing it to all my subscribers, but there are way too many of you now, so I scrapped that plan.

Also, in the real-life boxed version, the pigs don’t blow up, so there’s that.

That being said, these things are pretty bad ass. The AT-AT Attack Battle Game is the “traditional” Angry Birds-style game, where you fling birds at egg-stealing pigs in their shoddily-built structure trying to kill them. The little figures that come with it are pretty cool, even if I’m a complete Star Wars noob who can’t tell an AT-AT from an Ewok. One of those is a robot, right? Whatever, I just like hurling the dudes at the pig robot and making things crash. Squatch likes that, too. He does the same thing when I build things with his blocks on the floor, only the thing he throws at it is himself.

They also sent me that little Foam Flyer Darth Vader pig, which—until Squatch is old enough not to try taking bites out of the baddest bad guy in the history of film—we’re mostly using to throw at the cat whenever he tries getting up next to the TV. Seems like a totally Darth Vader thing to do, right?


The third thing in the box is the Millennium Falcon Bounce Game, which I have decided—in my magnanimity—to give away to one of my very special readers. It’s a little different from the normal Angry Birds game. It’s more like beer pong in a way. You have to bounce the little character balls into the Millennium Falcon while knocking off the cardboard baddies. Only you don’t then have to drink whatever Force Juice* is in the cup when someone gets it in.

*That sounded a lot more disgusting than I wanted it to.

Here’s what we’ll do for the giveaway. Leave a comment on this post and tell me you’re interested. You have till MIDNIGHT (CST) ON WEDNESDAY, MAY 8 to enter. I’ll pick a winner at random using some fancy randomizing method and that person will be the proud owner of a Millennium Falcon Bounce Game (retail $19.99), courtesy of Hasbro and a baby sasquatch. Sound like a bunch of awesome? Good.

Even if you don’t win or don’t want to enter, you can use the coupon code SWFANDAY at HasbroToyShop.com for the rest of today (May 4, 2013) to get 20% off any Star Wars toy.

FULL DISCLOSURE: I got these things, as I said, free from Hasbro. I wasn’t compensated for this in any other way, and all the opinions are mine. Obviously. They probably wouldn’t refer to “Force Juice.”


23 thoughts on “& may the fourth be with you

  1. Don’t enter me…the cat and my kids refuse to play games with me. The phrase ‘bad winner’ has been used when my name is brought up.

    • They just need to learn to handle the greatness. Some people are just put off by others’ success. Haters gon’ hate.

  2. My fancy randomizing method is me putting a number next to things and then asking my husband on a scale of 1-10 how badly he has to pee. Maybe don’t use that method with your wife.

    • That sounds an awful lot like my randomizing method. Only my question is “How many people did you want to stab in the neck today?”

  3. Pingback: & a review: moms telling it like it is | & squatch makes three

  4. My son has one of the other angry birds real life games and they’re a nightmare to set up for one turn; although I think he would enjoy more just to wind me up as I’m the one that sets it up!

  5. I am so in! It sounds like I can turn that into a drinking game after the kids go to bed! Come to find out, turning kids games into drinking games is my speciality. My best so far? Turning Doggie Doo into a libations game. And it is goooood…

  6. Why not? The youngest loves Stars Wars and Angry Birds. It’s killing one bird with two stones… or something, I’m horrible at math and metaphors, and possibly language in general. If I could shut up I would but too much coffee today.

  7. Pingback: & the other box | & squatch makes three

  8. Pingback: Winning | picture window views

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