…don’t go grocery shopping while hungry. Or with a pregnant lady.
Before I get to that, a quick background on our grocery shopping habits (because you totally care about that). Living in a small town, there aren’t a whole lot of shopping options. There’s a grocery store in town, but anyone who’s ever lived in a small town knows that’s a bad idea. Anytime we’ve shopped there, we’ve come home with at least one item that’s expired—usually more. Small town shopping tip: Check expiration dates. Usually, we forget to do that. As a result (and despite my previously declared repulsion) we shop a half-hour away at Wal-Mart. Ugh.
So, last week, after returning from Kansas to a pretty empty fridge, we needed to hit up the Wally-World. This was actually our first grocery shopping trip with the Squatch fetus, due to a couple out-of-town holidays and busy end-of-semester schedules. We ate lunch before going, since I tend to buy more unnecessary crap if I’m hungry.
This time, I wasn’t the one loading up the cart. I have no idea where most of it came from, but every time I turned around, the pile of food got bigger and bigger. A few caveats so I don’t get in trouble with Karli, though: 1) this was meant to be two weeks’ worth of groceries; 2) Karli’s sister came down for NYE, so we were picking up some snacks for that; and 3) I got one of those Keurig coffee makers for Christmas and bought a package of those cup things, which are expensive and added to our total.
In any case, by the time we checked out, our bill was almost $300, and I couldn’t tell you what all was in that cart. I’m willing to take my share of the blame for that, since I usually rely a little too much on Karli when it comes to shopping. I usually have a list when I go, whether she wrote it down or it’s in her head. She’s the Planner, and I guess it’s my fault for treating her like a day planner. Maybe I should’ve been keeping track myself. And in the coming months, I assume that’s going to have to be my job.
Okay, I lied. Here’s my theory on pregnancy brain. I don’t think it’s a biological condition caused by hormones or anything. I don’t think there’s any scientific proof to back that up, anyway. Because, frankly, my wife is smarter than me. And if anything, the pregnancy just means she’s even smarter now because she’s got the intelligence of her plus one Squatch. I think pregnancy brain is just a shift in focus. It’s a diversion of Karli’s normal fifty-things-at-once ability, because now 47 of those things are taken up by Squatch and things to do with Squatch. Which is good for Squatch—that fetus is in good hands if it’s got Karli’s attention. Other things are just going to get forgotten in the meantime. Pregnancy brain.
Point being, I think I’ll need to start making a list, because to top it off, we forgot a few things that we had mentioned going in. And not out-of-the-ordinary things, either. Things like a loaf of bread and potatoes, which I had to go back to the local store to pick up.
You win this time, pregnancy brain.